Nagra falls for Ray's hairy arse COCKNEY hardman Ray Winstone’s hairy arse is not the sort of thing you necessarily want to see in a two hour drama littered with sex scenes

It comes in the family LIKE father, like son. Coronation Street's randy pensioner Ken Barlow, and his bawdy bookmaker son, Peter, have both been sailing close to the rocks with their love lives. Ken took a step closer to showing canal dweller Martha,

Jordan's a Wright off WHAT is it about baggy-eyed Matthew Wright and rape claims? His desperately-dull morning show, The Wright Stuff (no it isn’t), took a surprise call from Jordan this week talking about how she’d been raped by a celebrity, whom she refused to name. Wri ...

Bring on Joe public WEEK 4,562 and Big Brother finally came to an end. Blonde bimbo Sophie and her pneumatic tits scooped the £70,000 prize money. It’s the one good thing to come out of an otherwise dismal tenth series. At least it means there is a good chance we will b ...

Thaila is so ballsy A MAN goes into a corner shop, buys a pack of tissues, grabs a porn mag from the shelf and proceeds to have a wank in the middle of the store! It can only be one programme—Balls Of Steel

A poke in the arts FINALLY,BBC2’s arty costume drama Desperate Romantics got down to some serious shagging.

GOOD MOURNING TV GMTV needs to drop the ‘G’ from its title before Trading Standards pay them a visit— because there is nothing remotely Good about it. Its only saving graces of another tired week were weather presenter Clare Nasir being sent to various seaside hellho ...

Dragons roar again A BUMBLING buffoon stumbles up the stairs with the sort of bizarre contraption last seen in a Leonardo da Vinci sketch

Mockers on Michael THE new series of Mock The Week kicked off with a fitting tribute to the dead “King of Pop” Michael Jackson. They ripped the piss out of him and his memorial service for fully 15 minutes. Frankie Boyle led the “tributes” saying: “His brother Jermaine ...

It's a lard life for kev IT must be the humid weather because things are getting very hot and sticky in Coronation Street.